Wednesday 16th November
In the mid 1990’s there was a TV sitcom called ‘Men Behaving Badly’. It was a great success, and really very very funny. It also caught a mood, which was being set by magazines like GQ and Loaded, where specifically ‘Lad’ behavior was celebrated, this was really nothing more nor less than old-fashioned bad behavior, but it was dressed up as being clever, post modern and very desirable. Why should any of this matter you might say, and really I couldn’t care less. There has always been a certain element in society which likes to behave badly, and luckily except for the occasional encounter late in the evening on the Tube, I don’t meet them very often. My only gripe with this rise in ‘Lad’ culture was that it legitimized rudeness, in a similar way that ‘Top Gear’ on television has become a byword for boorishness and vulgarity; not that this stops it being watched by millions I might add.
However one of the maybe unseen consequences of men being allowed to behave badly was the rise of ‘Women Behaving Badly’. As you know, I am no feminist; I quite like the differences between the sexes, and am more than ever convinced that, whereas some women can emulate men remarkably well, and of course the opposite aspect of really feminine men also exists, on the whole men are better at some things and women better at others. And behaving badly is far better performed by men.
The usual precursor to ‘Behaving Badly’ by either sex is consuming vast quantities of alcohol. Women are very poor drunks, not that men are good at being drunk, but because of their biology, they can generally drink far more than women can before they too fall over. At times I have drunk a bit too much myself, especially in Italy where the sunshine and lazy lifestyle and abundance of cheap wine and good food all conspire to encourage you to let your hair down. Perhaps I am fortunate, but I always seem to see a red light going on somewhere in the back of my head, and slow down and start to drink water or juice instead; maybe it is just that I am that bit more reserved in the first place, so have further to fall – whatever the reason, though often a bit tiddley, I have never been drunk.
What I find so sad is the sight of women getting drunk on the street. And the outrageous clothes they choose to wear, the ridiculous short skirts, the bra straps on show, the stupidly high stiletto’s and the ugliest thing of all – the waistline stringy T. of a thong showing between skirt and top. I saw a documentary recently made by Stephen Fry about Aids, and he was outside a nightclub in Newcastle talking to the girls going in, most dressed as above and already quite under the influence of alcohol; the shocking thing was how many of the girls were just like the boys, “looking for a shag”, and then at the end of the evening, being sick in the street, clothing and hair a mess, and more than likely prey for some unscrupulous men.
Why, oh why girls do you have to behave like men. It isn’t clever, it is just sad. And it won’t make you popular or loved or happy at all. One day you will wake up at maybe thirty-something and agree with me, so why do you have to go through all of this degrading behaviour in the first place. I know I am wasting my words on most of you, but I really feel they are worth saying anyway.