Thursday 3rd January

The trouble with my job is that if I do not do it I have to do it.  By that I mean that if I have time off I still have to do the work I would have done if I had not had the holiday.  Not that that stops me, it is simply the price I have to pay.  And now the days of reckoning begin; I have three clients and there will be almost two weeks of Accounts to process in three days, so longish hours beckon.

I really wonder sometimes how much longer I can carry on; some days I am Mr. Invincible, and others I just want to throw the laptop out of the window and stop work altogether.  I am in the process of trying to organize the summer so I can work maybe 6 or 7 days straight and then say 10 off, and do essential bits by e-mail.  That would in theory allow me to spend more time in France, though a lot of flights maybe.  We will see – a lot depends on our clients and how they fare in 2013.  I am amazed that one largish American restaurant is still open as its losses are colossal.  One other group is contemplating moth-balling at least one restaurant too, so it is quite possible that by natural wastage I will be down to three days or even less quite soon.  But then again there are rumours of new openings and new customers, so you never know.

Part of my trouble is that I am happier letting others make the decisions for me, and letting fate decide is always easier than actually making things happen.  But for now it is nose the grindstone time, which in a funny maybe slightly masochistic way I almost enjoy, just to catch up – then we will see.