Another Difference between men and women

Thursday 5th June

Facebook is full of homilies and sometimes funny, sometimes clever little posts which tend to generalize but in which we can always recognize some inner truth.  In some ways this social media phenomenon may be making us more tolerant and understanding, but in others it can promote hatred – I have seen not a few anti-Muslim posts too.  Last night I saw one of the funnier ones showing twelve ways in which men were different to women.  And being a man of course the ones which ridiculed women’s behaviour were the funniest.

I started thinking and came up with another vital difference which the list had omitted.  How we react to the actions of others.  As a man, if somebody does something which in some way impinges on my life I automatically assume that they simply hadn’t given me a thought.  I was incidental to their action, collateral damage you might say.  Yes, they could have been more considerate but there you go.

When another person’s actions affect a woman she invariably assumes that it was deliberate, that this other person had done it deliberately to offend or upset her.  The idea that they could have simply not considered her in their actions doesn’t occur to women.  They seem to place themselves at the centre of the Universe, and other’s actions must somehow be related to their own existence.  And I wonder where this comes from; is it biological or learned behaviour; nature or nurture?   I am always surprised, but shouldn’t be considering how often it happens, at this behaviour.  I have always understood that people are mostly like bulls in china shops and it is best to simply get out of their way and try to stay safe; it never occurs to me to think they are deliberately aiming their actions or words at me, I just happened to get in the way.