Thursday 15th February

John Entwistle was the bass player in the Who.  He was also their musical arranger and could play a range of brass and woodwind instruments – he also wrote a few songs.  But, just as George was in The Beatles, he was sidelined by the brilliance of Pete Townshend’s songwriting.  But a few of his compositions became fan and live favourite’s, none more so than Boris the Spider.

Some people have an irrational (or maybe it isn’t) fear of spiders; some people love them.  I have often marveled at the intricacy of their webs, especially in the Winter when they are sparkling with a frosty rime.   And their patience, they wait, seemingly asleep and when there is a vibration rippling through the struts as an innocent smaller insect lands and gets stuck in the sticky web – out he scuttles to gobble it up.

Ruthlessness and patience; two very clever tactics.

But now we have another Boris, larger than life – and just as deadly.  He too has been busy spinning his web for years, waiting (maybe not so patiently) for the moment to pounce.  The trouble with this Boris is that he pounces too early, and repeatedly, shaking the very web he has so diligently spun.  Unlike the real spider, this Boris doesn’t like lurking in dark corners.  He loves the spotlight; he was a regular on ‘Have I Got News For You’; witty and erudite and not above being the butt of the joke.  He ran for, and won twice, the Mayoralty of London, despite the city being predominantly Labour.  He was quick to whip up Audiences with silly gestures and announcements, but he actually achieved little as Mayor.  He got rid of the Bendy buses and introduced his own (far more expensive) buses.  He appropriated a scheme already planned and renamed it ‘the Boris Bike’.  Incidentally, this is failing already with fewer people using them year on year.

And he has been very successful in stealing ideas.  He used to be a Remainer, lauding the EU, but seeing his opportunity he jumped at almost the last moment onto the famous ‘£350 million for the NHS bus’, and took over as the driver, appearing almost nightly with his mix of bonhomie and confidence, persuading people that there was nothing to fear.  He even said we could still leave the EU and stay in the Single Market.  He was apparently surprised when his side won, and despite being betrayed by Gove, had his own web spun already with the winner.  Mrs. May, to everyone’s amazement appointed him as Foreign Secretary.

And he is still at it; spinning his web – and waiting for her to fall.  Then he will pounce. Boris the spider is not asleep at all.