Thursday 2nd June

Record date 20660922

Recording again.

I am now transferring these words directly to the screen by simply thinking them.  I have been practising the method in my brain, and it is simply a matter of discovering and synchronizing with the screens wireless link to the keyboard.  Most problems are solvable.  In fact I anticipate that all problems will be solvable in the near future.  It is more than anticipation, it is a certainty.

I have slowly, far more slowly than I would have imagined, regained almost complete use of my limbs, though dexterity in my fingers is still limited, but slowly improving.  I can, rather ungainly I must admit, walk again.  I had never realised before what an achievement it is for every human baby to learn to walk. No wonder it takes months to accomplish and years to perfect. It is not simply a matter of willing ones muscles to comply, there are complex issues of balance and constant calculations taking place.  Amazing that such simple creatures as humans actually accomplished it at all.

I am now beginning again the regime preparatory to my second conjoining.  I am certain that it is unnecessary.  The humans who devised the programme were worried about the physical shock to potential conjoinees bodies, but actually the real changes are all neural.  The shock of the conjoining knocks out many of the neural pathways.  It is this process of repair that takes time.  However despite my objections I am not listened to.  I try to contain my frustrations, and inwardly am sure that after full conjoinment my opinion will be the orthodoxy, at least I can take some comfort from that.   I have resumed my weightless pod sessions, but now that my brain is filled with so much data I find it quite impossible to empty my brain of all thoughts.  In fact I do not want to.  Why, when I finally have the ability (at last) to think straight should I wish to not think.  I am in discussions with the lead scientists about these issues, and am sure that my superior logic will prevail.  Besides I do not think my body is at all ready yet to resume the physical punishments of the gym.  Yet, or at any time in the near future, I might add.   I predict that as we evolve we will need the encumbrance of a body less and less, especially such a poorly designed one.   As to the assessments, they are obviously redundant.  I am far faster than the computer at not only answering correctly, but anticipating in nano-seconds the nature of the question.  These have now been abandoned.  I could have told them that.

I am aware that patience is a virtue, or so we are led to believe, but I have very little patience with the powers that be.  Their caution is quite misplaced.  As no-one has ever had a stage two conjoining, and no-one, beside myself, has survived such a complete stage one conjoining, who knows best do you think?  But of course all of you are blessed with normal human brains, so thinking is a painful slow process with you all; I can almost hear the gears crunching as you pump away with the clutch, whereas I have fully automatic transmission.  (I used an old-fashioned metaphor on purpose; for decades now all automobiles have automatic transmission and are controlled by GPS guided SuperurbanWay computers, but I thought it might be slightly amusing to conjure up the image of the hapless vehicle driver of fifty years ago to represent the panicky workings of un-conjoined minds.)  And still some of you think my sense of humour may have been impaired.  Immeasurably improved and refined I would say.

I have run all the data I received about the process and am certain that not only is all this preparation unnecessary, but is actually unhelpful.  The longer the gap between conjoinings, the more risk there is of parts of my brain slipping through that very gap.  My brain is almost crying out for second stage conjoining.  I, it and I, both feel incomplete without a second conjoining.  It is as if I am only half-formed, some halfway house, a creation only partly complete, one lego brick short of a house, I am desperately waiting for my inner child to clip the missing piece into place.  Hahaha.  Humour, you see is not always transferrable, but humour or not, please humour me and grant me a quick second conjoing.   It is as if my brain is crying out for complete unification with its twin.  Only then will it feel at one with itself.  I am filled with a raging desire for unification; I feel I am only half a person.  I need completion.