Wednesday 25th December
At last you can breathe a sigh of relief, the turkey, (or in our case the roast chicken) is in the oven, the potatoes and parsnips are par-boiled, the sprouts are ready too. The great thing is that despite only having six different cheeses and a mere five chutneys and the fruit and nuts are looking a bit depleted after last night’s binge you can actually say “Christmas shopping is over until next year”. At last. Now open those presents and tut-tut at the socks and gloves you have been bought, when you spent so much time and effort in finding exactly the perfect present for the perennial sock-giver. Sit back with a glass of Champagne (we are in a recession after all) and flick through channel after channel of rubbish looking for just something that might be a touch entertaining.
The weather outside is frightening, throw another log on the fire, or turn the thermostat up a notch, pour yourself just one more glass of port to go with the only six cheeses and crackers, adjust the paper hat slightly over your eyes, and drift off into a well-deserved nap.
That’s what I’ll be doing, so Bonne Noel, Joyeaux Fetes, and Bonne Annee too. Twenty Fourteen is just around the corner, yet I can still remember as a boy looking at the date 2000, and wondering – I would be forty-nine then, what on earth would life be like. Not so bad as it turned out. But it goes bloody quickly I can tell you, so enjoy it while it is here. Merry Christmas to you all.